Soldier Killed Today in Northern Iraq

Now the waiting starts. Waiting to hear the name on the news or read the name in a military press release. I know from past experience that I won't hear from him for a couple more days. Probably not before Friday. They won't let him talk to us until the Soldier's family is notified of his death.

It becomes unbearable. The angst. That feeling of insecurity, anxiety and apprehension. You start to pray - praying that he sends an email, calls you on the phone - something... anything. You pray that the Soldier is a name you don't recognize, someone that he doesn't know either.

You can't help but think to yourself what it would be like to have that car pull up in front of your home. You imagine your reaction. A lump forms in your throat as you think about it. Feelings become so real that they well up into your eyes and then slide warmly down your cheeks. You know that someplace, for someone, it's happening - probably just as you are thinking about it.

You think about the pain they must be feeling. You think about it and you want to withdraw, you want to leave and go someplace far away. But you know you can't. You can't because you know that he's going to need you and you have to be there when he does.